11w3d - Why I really hate shopping

So for the last week or so, I have been using a rubber band to button my pants. I can sort of fit into one pair of my fat jeans, but that's about it. I can't button anything else up. I really didn't think that I would be gaining so much so early, but I have been eating anything that's not nailed down, so I'm sure that's contributing. So I decided that I needed to go ahead and buy some maternity clothes.

I despise shopping for clothes, and it's really not any better when your fat and don't yet really look pregnant. It just makes me sad. I ended up finding two pairs of pants, but couldn't find any dress pants that fit my thighs without being horribly too big everywhere else. And I bought a couple of shirts. The thing is, the shirts make me look pregnant. I'm not sure how I feel about that, but I suppose that looking pregnant is better than looking fat. I just don't think that I was ready for that realization yet. In any matter, I am incredibly excited about the fact that I will be comfortable in the pants that I bought, and I won't have to unzip every time I get in the car. I've still been feeling great, and am past the point of morning sickness, so I think that I got away easy on that one.

10w1d - First Appointment

So my first appointment did help me as I thought it would - I got to hear the heartbeat! They didn't know if we would be able to hear it at 10 weeks, but we did, and it really helped me feel better about being pregnant. 182 beats per minute, that took a while to find, but really made me smile when I heard it.

This week has been rough for me a far as feeling well though. I haven't thrown up, but I almost wish that I would just get it over with. I constantly feel like I am going to throw up, and keep burping, very close to throwing up, but never quite there. I know that so many people have it worse, but I've been doing so well up until now, that I feel I need to complain a little.

About 10 week preggers

So I found out that I was pregnant about 4 weeks ago. Since they don't really schedule you for an appointment until you're a little ways in, I'm dying to go. I have my appointment Thursday, and it can not come quickly enough. I don't want to go because I am excited, but rather the opposite. Now, we have been trying to get pregnant for some time, so yes, I was expecting this. But I don't feel that I have anything to be excited about yet. I don't feel pregnant, and want to see something to be excited about. Hopefully my first appointment will help.

Now when I say I don't feel pregnant, I mean emotionally, or something like that. Because I cried when I saw a dead deer on the side of the road the other day. And while watching America's Got Talent. So in some regards, yeah, the signs are there. I also can't think about eating chicken right now, and I had to buy a bigger bra. But even though all of those signs are there, I still don't "feel" it, not really. So wish me luck, hopefully my appointment will help to move me along!